Category Archives: PartyPants

File This Under Things You Can’t Unsee

Posted on March 4, 2011 | Leave a comment

There are a multitude of things in life that you just wish you hadn’t seen, or heard.  Like diaper changes after pureed peas, or a spouse’s bodily functions, there are things that burns themselves onto your retinas.

This morning, as I powered through a very special hour of cardio, designed to undo the previous evening’s caloric sh*t-storm courtesy of a very special Girl Scout delivery, I happened to look up and catch a few moments of pure television gold. Unfortunately this television happened to be hanging just above the douchebag talking on the phone while peddling a stationary bike (or possibly pretending to talk while bike in oder to secure the piece of equipment with the best view of the spinning class going on just behind the glass). But I digress just because douchebag was my word-of-the-day.

Back to the story, behold… what I would like to file under things you just can’t unsee:

http://video.aol.com/video/kathie-lee-and-hoda-belly-dance-030411-tv-replay/1944280431

And for those blessed souls who can’t see this video, here is a screenshot because no one escapes this…

Kathie Lee was not talking during the capturing of this screenshot... I believe this may be her "I'm too sexy" face or something... sadly indicating that she thought this was sexy.

Ahhh, Kathie Lee, you’re a slightly less dangerous Charlie Sheen without the septum degradation. I would take issue with the fact that you still have a job even though you share a pharmacist with Paula, but seeing you each morning is like hanging out with a sorority girl on a bender without all of the messy side-effects.

However, I do take issue with the fact that, like Marisa Tomei, Kathie Lee is ruining my romanticized notions of hot, never-aging vampires.  Isn’t she supposed to be like *really* old?

Devil Horns | Melody

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A Valentine for You, My Friend

Posted on February 14, 2011 | Leave a comment

On this, a very special Valentine’s Day…

That is how much I love you.

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What Happens in Nashvegas, Stays in Nashvegas… Unless You Blog

Posted on February 2, 2011 | 14 Comments

There ain’ t nothing like a blogging conference bahbay,
to get a bunch of mommas out going crahzay.

I started this post when I had just arrived home from Nashville where I attended the Blissdom blogging conference… I am finishing this post a few days later when I have had time to catch back up with life.

PS: I use the word “attended” loosely since this was the first, and what I fear may be the last, chance I had to take a nap, get a manicure, and get a massage while the sun is out for at least the next eighteen years.

This is what happens when four bloggy mommas pack into a VW, drive 85 m.p.h. down a highway for four hours, and cram themselves into a hotel room for three nights and four days.

I know. Jealousy is a cruel mistress (and thank you roomie Hannah for the pic!)

So what did I learn during my trip to Nashvegas for Blissdom?

1) MC Hammer has nothing on my most excellent rommie, Hannah. When she says it’s Hannah Time, she means it…

2) Two free drink tickets per blogger makes for a bunch of really cheap dates.

3) I know the song typically goes that you don’t want your babies to grow up to be cowboys. Whoever wrote that song never met an ag salesman. “Tractor Convention” is really a euphemism for “Horney Married Dude Gathering.”

As if that wasn’t earth shattering enough, I attended the amazing opening keynote by Brene Brown, whose entire speech was inspirational in a way that I am pretty sure will shape the way I look at both my business and motherhood. (What really got me was when she said, when someone asks something of you to, “Choose discomfort over resentment.”)

I also had a blast hearing all of the creative content ideas from Mrs. Flinger,  Amy Turn Sharp, and Jim from the Busy Dad Blog during the one writing session I was able to attend (and not just because, they pulled out the super-meme slide of awesomeness replete with rainbows, ninjas, and unicorns).

Next stop, hopefully Type A Parent in Asehville. Or dare I hope to afford the ticket price for BlogHer? With all the two free booze tickets every night, and me being a super cheap date, it totally pays for its self.

Devil Horns! | Melody

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Baby Shower Inspiration, Ahoy!

Posted on December 30, 2010 | 4 Comments

No, I do not have any personal news to share with you, and shame on your for thinking that. I am, however, excited to be welcoming two additions to the family via some other poor souls’ uteruses in the next year. And, I am additionally thrilled to be hosting or co-hosting baby showers for these fierce and lovely women.

In t-minus one week I will be hosting a shower at my house for my best friend, who will be having a bitty-baby boy in early spring. Using my favorite online inspiration clipper, Polyvore, here is a peek at what I have planned!

The invitations have been sent, and I am in the midst of pom-pom making madness. They are turning out pretty cute, and I plan to use the same tissue to decoupage on the outside of candle holders to place on the table.

Instead of buying the soaps, I’ll be hunting down some duck candy molds, glycerine soap, soap dye, and baby powder scenting for the little duckies. The plan is to wrap them individually in cellophane and place them at each seat to add color to the table, while suspending the pom-poms overhead for a fun, festive look.

On the menu: I am making the hi-hat cupcake recipe I got from Stef at CupcakeProject.com in exchange for a donation earlier this fall. I will have those puppies in my trusty cupcake stand, fear not. I will also be making chicken salad on croissants, a fruit salad, and a lettuce salad for lunch. And what shower would be complete without sugar-rimmed champagne glasses? I’ll be mixing the bubbly with blueberry juice to compliment the color scheme- yum!

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Mrs SmartyPants At Your Service

Posted on December 13, 2010 | 2 Comments

In the past few years I have had quite a few people someone say that they want my help planning their wedding or party. I love this kind of stuff so I always jump at the opportunity. I recently had a couple of openings pop up in the planner for 2011 because of projects that have been changed or postponed, and to me and open spot means an opportunity to get creative. I thought maybe I could use my time to help a few folks out with their party planning needs because filling my scheduling holes with something I love to do, and making some interesting blog fodder from it, sounds like a heck of a lot of fun to me.

Here’s the story: I will help you plan your party for free (any party except for weddings- I actually charge for that schtuff because I am not insane). All you have to do is let me take some pictures and blog about the party on here when it arrives!  I’ll help with setup, but I will quietly sneak out before the shindig begins. (If you live out of the St. Louis area I will have to ask you to send the pics though… this volunteer project doesn’t have a travel budget).

I can only wrangle one party a month so each month is first come, first served… and May is reserved for Boogie’s first birthday bash. Just email me at melody [dot] meiners [at] gmail [dot] com and let me know what and when your party is, and why you need help with it! I’ll email you back and let you know when the fun commences.

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